• In 1900, bad bobby put a roof over his family’s head, he was a success.
• Today, bb's son Badfisherman figures it takes a roof, deck, pool, and 4-car garage. And that’s just the vacation home.

• In 1900, Blackdog's father waited for the doctor to tell him when the baby arrived.
• Today, Blackdog's son must wear a smock, know how to breathe, and make sure film is on the video camera.

• In 1900, Slims father could count on children to join the family business.
• Today, Slim prays their kids will soon come home from college long enough to teach them how to work the computer and set the VCR.

• In 1900, Hunt22 father shook his children gently and whispered, “Wake up, it’s time for school.”
• Today, Hunt's kids shake their fathers violently at 4 a.m., shouting: “Wake up, it’s time for hockey practice.”

• In 1900, Whitey's father came home from work to find his wife and children at the supper table.
• Today, Whitey comes home to a note: “Jimmy’s at baseball, Cindy’s at gymnastics, I’m at the gym, Pizza in the fridge.”

• In 1900, Bk's Father’s Day gift would be a hand tool.
• Today, Bk gets a digital organizer.

• In 1900, “a good day at the market” meant Cam T's Father brought home feed for the horses.
• Today, “a good day at the market” means Cam T got in early on an IPO.




• Four expectant fathers were in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room, while their wives were in labor.
• The nurse tells Ben Bragg, "Congratulations! You're the father of twins!"
• "What a coincidence! I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team!"

• The nurse returns and tells Papa Jack, "You are the father of triplets!"
• "Wow, what a coincidence! I work for 3M Corporation!"

• The nurse then tells Papa D that his wife has given birth to quadruplets.
• "Another coincidence! I work at the Four Seasons Hotel!"

• At this point, the fourth guy ( Gordon ) faints. When he comes to, the others ask what's wrong.
• "What's wrong?! I work for Seven-Up!"




On Father's Day, Jarhead decides to make his dad breakfast in bed. He makes scrambled eggs, toast, and coffee. He brings it into his dad, hands him the cup of coffee and says,''Try it, dad.''

The Jar's dad takes a sip and nearly passes out because it is so strong. ( must be a Marine thing ) Jar asks,''How do you like it, Dad?'' Jar's dad doesn't want to hurt the boy's feelings so he says, ''This is ... something else, I've never tasted coffee quite like this before, Son.'' Jar smiles from ear to ear. And says, ''Drink some more Pops.''
As the dad is drinking, he notices two army men in the bottom of the cup, and says,''Hey! Why did you put army men in here?''

Jaqrhead again smiles and sings,''The Best Part Of Waking Up, Is SOLDIERS In Your Cup.''