Could you run it thru a short section of PCV pipe

The son finally bit the bullet and moved his Dad into a nursing home and called to make an appointment to go by and check on him…before he arrived the old fella awakened to a huge boner and immediately called the nurse.
Seeing his predicament she just hiked up her skirt and serviced the ole man. A few minutes later his son arrived and asked “how are you liking the nursing home?” The Dad answered “I love it, you should have moved me in here years ago, best idea you have ever had. Smiling the son left very pleased with himself and the ole man drifted off for a nap…on awakening he had to use the rest room and half way across the room fell on his knees and couldn’t get up and also his g***m gapped open exposing his bare backside. Calling for help a gay/q***r orderly came to the door and seeing the predicament just dropped his trousers and serviced the ole man. When he was able he struggled back into his bed and with his cellphone called his son and said “get me out of here I h**e it and don’t want to stay one more minute.” Interrupting his Dad the son said “Dad, dad what is wrong as just a couple of hours ago you loved it so what has changed?” The ole man replied “I’ll tell you what’s changed I only get an erection once a year and I fall down 3 to 4 times a day?”
Yup headed for the attic, but that’s funny?

Plum…I save a lot of the “thoughts of the day” in my photos to reread and Yup Mom thinks I’m nuts…todays reminds me of one of my all time favorites…”if you think you can or you can’t, your right?”
DrChip

Thanks for the Congrats PixieK-9…we need to stick together or they will overwhelm us???
This is the same difference…a rancher dies and he leaves his sons his remuda…oldest gets 1/2, middle gets 1/3, and youngest gets 1/9 and there are 17 horses in the herd. Everyone gets a full horse, but involves a lawyer.
Sooo, the lawyer not being very smart rides to the ranch and turns his horse into the pen, divides the horses and gets on his horse and rides back to town. Easy to figure now isn’t it?

$25 + 3 + 2= $30…There is no missing dollar. Instead of $9 the men actually paid $8.33 each + 3 + 2 again = $30.
Wrong term but it’s like an optical elusion… DrChip

Assuming your trip will not be too long, close to the bus stop thread the tip of the rod down your left pants leg into your sock and into your loafer shoe( YES before all of this your need to practice walking stiffed legged and making two steps up) then unbutton your shirt, then rebutton it around the rod with the grip now up by your left cheek, then wearing a hat at least 2 sizes too large put it on covering the end of the grip. I would put on dark glasses and pretend to be blind. OH, probably need a note from your wife that you are a fishing maniac and OWN the rod but have to ride the bus?(This will be helpful when you are stopped by every police officer and assorted law enforcement that are gonna assume you have stolen the rod) I would carry the reel in my hand and make casting sounds and reeling motions, otherwise not speaking or having to explain your questionable behavior.
Good Luck as you didn’t qualify convenient but asked how?

BF and I have remembered that we actually went to Jr High School together a few years ago?
Sooo long time friends have to watch out for each other?/

BB...you know Marines, like BF, NEVER speak ill of others, especially a man of your advanced age??? Whatever comment he would make would be “trying” to help the older generation???

GIRLS LIKE PEACHES
WITH LOTS OF FUZZ
YOU’RE NO PEACH
AND NEVER WAS
Burma Shave
I actually never saw this jingle, but my Dad the retired Colonel, swore it was one of Burma Shave’s first and everytime we saw a line of Burma Shave signs he would repeat this one?

You know at our age when we first awaken in the spring, hear the birds tweeting, see the sun shining, the smells of the grass and outdoors thru the open window our mindset is the same as when we were 16, BUT, then we have to move to go do what we all go do and instantly our bodies remind us we are NOT 16 anymore???

Blunderbuss, anything metal especially small pieces of chain, clearing out as many people as they could and don’t have a clue on the word to unscramble? Dr.Chip

No Lon, I had missed it and read it after this current response...Man I truly hate that about your brother and Thank the Lord that your sister is making progress??
I’ll bet the ranch that 60 years ago when we were at North Junior neither one of us had a clue that something as catastrophic as this Damn Coronavirus or anything similar would ever happen in our lifetime??? You know, my wife Dana, asked me to self quarantine to our place on the evening of the 12th March and from then up until late in August or early September I was off only 3 times...Still today even if only running to the Post Office I wear a mask and carry hand sanitizer. Folks in town ask her if they can come by and visit me and her answer is “No he is quarantined?” But then she says she just walks away...Truthfully I have enough here to do and with a couple of ongoing health hiccups I really don’t even want to take a chance?
She & I will keep you and your family in our thoughts and prayers.
Chip

Thank you, thank you, not from me but from my wife, she says the first exercise program that she has ever seen that she can actually perform. The laughing was enough exercise for as coffee came through my nose.

“G” I’d have to agree to a check also...DrChip

Years ago deep in the Ozark Mountains there was a one room school house with grades from kindergarten to the 8th grade. Sooo on the first day of school the teacher said students I want you to introduce yourself by saying your name. So, Billy, Mary, Johnny, Sally and then to a bigger 4th grader who stood up and said “Snot Nose.”Of course the teacher immediately jumped in and said “that’s not funny so say your name.” Again the bigger 4th grader said “Snot Nose.” The teacher said “last chance, just tell us what your folks call you, and if you don’t, go to the principal’s office.” Again the 4th grader said “Snot Nose” and started for the door but stopped and walked over to a tiny cute little kindergartener girl and taking her by the hand said “Come on Shitty Britches she ain’t gonna believe you either?”