badbobby wrote:
I may have posted this before
if so,I'm sorry
but I just love it
The three little pigs-modernized
The animal I really dig
above all others is the pig
pigs are noble,pigs are clever
pigs are courteous,however
now and then ,to break the rule
one meets a pig who is a fool
what for example,would you say
if strolling through the woods one day
right in front of you,you saw
a pig who'd built his house of straw?
A PIG WHO'D BUILT HIS HOUSE OF STRAW?
The wolf who saw it licked his lips
"Little pig,little pig,let me in
'no,no,not by the hair on my chinny chin chin
"Then I'll huff and I'll puff,and Ill blow your house in"
the little pig began to pray
but wolfie blew his house away
he shouted,'bacon,pork and ham,
Oh what a lucky wolf I am'
and though he ate the pig quite fast
he saved the curly tail for last
now wolfie wandered on,a trifle bloated
surprise surprise,for soon he noted
another little house built by a pig
this one erected with twigs
"little pig,little pig let me in'
'no,no,not by the hair on my chinny chin chin'
'then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll blow your house in
OL wolfie said"Oh boy,here we go
he then began to huff and blow
the pig inside began to squeal
he cried'oh wolf,youv'e had one meal
why can't we talk and make a deal?
ol wolfie replied"not on your nelly'
and soon the pig was in his belly
'two very nice pigs"cried the wolf
"but still,I'm not satisfied
I know how full my tummy's bulging
but oh how I love such indulging
so creeping quietly as a mouse
ol wolfie approached another house
a house of brick with a pig inside
a little pig trying to hide
"you won't eat me'the pig cried
"Ill blow your house down" ol wolfie replied
'you will need'pig said'a lot of puff,and I don't think youv'e got enough
ol wolfie huffed and puffed and blew and blew
but the brick house stayed as good as new
"If I can't blow it down"Ol wolfie said
I'll blow it up instead
I'll come back in the dead of night,and blow the damned thing up with dynamite"
pig cried"Oh you brute,I might have known"
then picking up the telephone
he dialed as quickly as he could
the number of 'Red Riding Hood'
"Hello",she said"Who is calling,who"?
oh ,hello piggy,how are you?
pig cried"I need your help miss Hood
Oh help me please,do you think you could"?
I'll try of course,Miss Hood replied'what's on your mind"?
"A wolf"piggy replied
I know you have dealt with wolves before
and now I've got one at my door"
"My darling pig "she said"my sweet,
that is something right up my street'
I've just begun to wash my hair
and as soon as it is dry.I'll be there
A short while later through the wood
came striding,brave Miss Riding Hood
ol wolfie stood there,his eyes ablaze
all yellowish,like mayonaize
his teeth were sharp,his gums were raw
once more Miss Hoods eyelid flickers
she draws her pistol from her nickers
once more she hits the vital spot
and kills ol wolfie with a single shot
piggy ,peering through his window,stood
and yelled"Well done Miss Riding Hood'
Ah piggy, you must never trust
young ladies from the upper crust
for now ,Miss Riding Hood,one notes
not only has two wolf skins
but now when she goes from place to place
Miss Hood has a pig skin traveling case
I may have posted this before br if so,I'm sorry b... (
show quote)
These are all good and on my level.