badbobby Loc: Humble Texas

1---Law of mechanical repair
After your hands become coated with grease and oil,\your nose will begin to itch and you will need to pee

#2--Law of gravity
Any tool,nut,bol or screw,\\when dropped will always roll to the most inaccessible place

#3--Law of probability
The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act

#4--Law of random numbers
If you dial a wrong number you never get a busy signal someone always answers

#5--Law of variations
If you change grocery or traffic lanesthe one you were in, will always move faster than the one you are now in

#6--Law of the bath--When the body is fully immersed in waterthe telephone will ring

#7--Law of close encounters
The odds of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with

#8--Law of the result
When you try to prove that a machine won't work--it will

#9--Law of biomechanics
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach

#10--Law of football games and theaters
At any event the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle always arrive last.They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food and drinkor to go to the toilet.And always leave early before the end of the game(or performance is over.The folks in the aisle seats come early and never move even once.They have long, gangly legs or big pot bellies and always stay to the bitter end .These aisle people are for some reason, extremely surly folk

#11--The coffee law
As soon as you sit down to a cuppa hot coffee your boss(Wife) will ask(tell) you to do something which will last until your coffee is cold

#12--Law of locker rooms
If there are only two people in the locker room they will have adjacent lockers

#13--Law of physical surfaces
The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on the floor are directly correlated to the cost and newness of the carpet

#14--Law of logical argument
Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about

#15--Law of physical appearance
If the clothes fit they are not pleasing to the eye

#16--Law of public speaking
A closed mouth will gather no feet

#17--Law of commercial marketing strategy
As soon as you find a product you really like.They will stop making it or the store will stop selling it

#18--Doctors law
If you aren't feeling well make an appointment with your Doctor.By the time you get thereyou will feel better.On the other hand ,if you don't make the appointment you will get worse

Finally
Law of aging
I thought growing so old would take longer

Ne. fisherman Loc: Central Nebraska Arnold

Those are some great ones, BB, I can relate well to #’s 1&2! I was a mechanic , under the work bay was a floor drain you learned to have a good retractable magnet available always! Sockets, nuts and bolts always rolled to the exact geometric center under the vehicle!

Able Man Loc: North Coast (Cleveland, Ohio)

Thanks, badbobby!... That #14 is the real-live TRUTH, ¿Ain't it?

bahmer Loc: Northern Illinois Rockford

All are good there badbobby thanks for the laughs.

badbobby Loc: Humble Texas

really is
I practice it all the time

Barnacles Loc: Northern California

It's worse for me! I could spread a white king-sized bedsheet on my shop floor, and if I fumble a screw or small part, I STILL CAN'T FIND IT!

EasternOZ Loc: Kansas City Metro

Stuck in your shoe sole?

Able Man Loc: North Coast (Cleveland, Ohio)

"If you can't dazzle them with brilliance..."