Winston Churchill
Mar 13, 2020 15:37:31 #
Winston Churchill loved araprosdokians, figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected.
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
5. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
6. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
7. They begin the evening news with 'Good Evening,' then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
I thought I wanted a career. Turns out, I just wanted pay checks.
10. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put "DOCTOR."
11. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
12. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street...with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
13. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
14. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
15. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
16. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
17. There's a fine line between cuddling and.. holding someone down so they can't get away.
18. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
19. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
20. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
21. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
22. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
23. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Finally:
24. I'm supposed to respect my elders , but now it’s getting harder and harder for me to find one.
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
5. War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
6. Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
7. They begin the evening news with 'Good Evening,' then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
I thought I wanted a career. Turns out, I just wanted pay checks.
10. In filling out an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency, notify:' I put "DOCTOR."
11. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
12. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street...with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
13. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.
14. A clear conscience is the sign of a fuzzy memory.
15. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
16. Money can't buy happiness, but it sure makes misery easier to live with.
17. There's a fine line between cuddling and.. holding someone down so they can't get away.
18. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.
19. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
20. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
21. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be.
22. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
23. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
Finally:
24. I'm supposed to respect my elders , but now it’s getting harder and harder for me to find one.
Mar 13, 2020 15:55:48 #
You don't need to avoid temptation. As you get older, it will avoid you.
Mar 13, 2020 17:01:16 #
Mar 13, 2020 17:17:32 #
Being smart is knowing how to get out of a tough situation. Being wise is not getting into it in the first place.
The difference between unlawful & illegal. Unlawful is going something that will break a law. Illegal is a sick bird 🦅.
The difference between unlawful & illegal. Unlawful is going something that will break a law. Illegal is a sick bird 🦅.
Mar 13, 2020 22:21:24 #
Politicians are like diapers. They both need to be changed often..... and for the same reason!
Mar 13, 2020 23:11:38 #
Mar 13, 2020 23:38:38 #
Mar 14, 2020 11:21:33 #
Mar 14, 2020 11:29:01 #
Steelhead Mickey wrote:
Being smart is knowing how to get out of a tough situation. Being wise is not getting into it in the first place.
The difference between unlawful & illegal. Unlawful is doing something that will break a law. Illegal is a sick bird 🦅.
The difference between unlawful & illegal. Unlawful is doing something that will break a law. Illegal is a sick bird 🦅.
*doing (was going)
Mar 14, 2020 20:29:20 #
You can be on the right road, but still get run over, if you just stand there
Mar 14, 2020 21:08:41 #
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station.
Mar 14, 2020 21:14:54 #
Mar 14, 2020 21:27:10 #
Roads are full of dead squirrels who could not make a decision.
Mar 14, 2020 21:28:02 #
Gordon wrote:
Roads are full of dead squirrels who could not make a decision.
...or, just a Bad one...
Mar 14, 2020 21:42:13 #
ghaynes1
Loc: Strawberry Plains, TN
"I would never belong to a club that had me as a member." -Groucho Marx.
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