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How Many Cows?
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Mar 15, 2021 14:36:25   #
hacksaw Loc: Pasadena, Texas
 
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it.
Hack 🇺🇸🍺🍺

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new 2021 BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man named Cliff in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Galaxy S21® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.


Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"


"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know anything about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog.”

AND THAT, FOLKS, IS THE PROBLEM

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 14:44:06   #
Whitey Loc: Southeast ohio
 
hacksaw wrote:
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it.
Hack 🇺🇸🍺🍺

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new 2021 BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man named Cliff in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Galaxy S21® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.


Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"


"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know anything about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog.”

AND THAT, FOLKS, IS THE PROBLEM
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it. br... (show quote)


Right on HACk👍

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 14:59:44   #
CoDen Loc: Little R, SC
 
hacksaw wrote:
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it.
Hack 🇺🇸🍺🍺

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new 2021 BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man named Cliff in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Galaxy S21® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.


Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"


"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know anything about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog.”

AND THAT, FOLKS, IS THE PROBLEM
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it. br... (show quote)


And thats the truth. Right on Hack 🌴😎🌴

Reply
 
 
Mar 15, 2021 15:04:06   #
EasternOZ Loc: Kansas City Metro
 
hacksaw wrote:
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it.
Hack 🇺🇸🍺🍺

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new 2021 BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man named Cliff in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Galaxy S21® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.


Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"


"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know anything about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog.”

AND THAT, FOLKS, IS THE PROBLEM
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it. br... (show quote)


Sweet.

Nice 1 Hack

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 15:13:22   #
Fresh water pirate Loc: West Sacramento calif
 
hacksaw wrote:
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it.
Hack 🇺🇸🍺🍺

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new 2021 BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man named Cliff in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Galaxy S21® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.


Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"


"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know anything about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog.”

AND THAT, FOLKS, IS THE PROBLEM
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it. br... (show quote)


Great one hack 👍🦈

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 15:18:40   #
RuffplayOR57 Loc: Klamath Falls, OR
 
hacksaw wrote:
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it.
Hack 🇺🇸🍺🍺

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in Montana when suddenly a brand-new 2021 BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.

The driver, a young man named Cliff in a Brioni® suit, Gucci® shoes, RayBan® sunglasses and YSL® tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, will you give me a calf?"

Bud looks at the man, who obviously is a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell® notebook computer, connects it to his Apple iPhone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.

The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop® and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Apple iPad® that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL® database through an ODBC connected Excel® spreadsheet with email on his Galaxy S21® and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet® printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud.

He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.


Then Bud says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"


The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"


"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.


"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, “but how did you guess that?"


"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know anything about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter. This is a herd of sheep. Now give me back my dog.”

AND THAT, FOLKS, IS THE PROBLEM
This is kinda long but I think you’ll enjoy it. br... (show quote)


Spot On Hack, Spot On!! But I don’t Believe it Only Apply’s to Congressman

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 15:25:07   #
Grizzly 17 Loc: South central Pa
 
LOL worth the read Hack 👍👍

Reply
 
 
Mar 15, 2021 15:41:18   #
bottomcoon Loc: Tahlequah, oklahoma
 
You're the man Hack. Those government people are only here to help.

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 15:42:44   #
Huntm22 Loc: Northern Utah. - West Haven
 
So true!

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 15:52:22   #
EasternOZ Loc: Kansas City Metro
 
bottomcoon wrote:
You're the man Hack. Those government people are only here to help.


Themselves

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 15:54:07   #
Chuck56 Loc: Texas
 
Thanks, Hack. I needed the laugh.....

Reply
 
 
Mar 15, 2021 16:08:12   #
E.pa.al Loc: Martin's Creek
 
👍👍 lmao

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 16:19:32   #
Silversail
 
Good one Hack! But!!! I thought it was a joke... not the truth...

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 16:40:18   #
GaryH Loc: Northern Pa.
 
Hack strikes again.. 😂😂😂😂😂

Reply
Mar 15, 2021 16:47:06   #
Big A Loc: Mesa, Arizona
 
bottomcoon wrote:
You're the man Hack. Those government people are only here to help.


Question is - WHO ?
Are they here to help
US or themselves ?

Reply
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