. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the idiot's name.(it is BadFisherman)
3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then, neither does milk.
5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
*BONUS RULES:*
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
And as I get older, I realize:
#1 - I talk to myself, because there are times I need expert advice.
#2 - I consider "On Trend" to be the clothes that still fit.
#3 - I don't need anger management. People need to stop pissing me off.
#4 - My people skills are just fine. My tolerance for idiots needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."
#6 - I have days when my life is just a tent away from a circus.
#7 - These days, "on time" is when I get there.
#8 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#9 - Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
#10 - Lately, I've noticed people my age are so much older than me
badbobby wrote:
. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the idiot's name.(it is BadFisherman)
3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then, neither does milk.
5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
*BONUS RULES:*
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
And as I get older, I realize:
#1 - I talk to myself, because there are times I need expert advice.
#2 - I consider "On Trend" to be the clothes that still fit.
#3 - I don't need anger management. People need to stop pissing me off.
#4 - My people skills are just fine. My tolerance for idiots needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."
#6 - I have days when my life is just a tent away from a circus.
#7 - These days, "on time" is when I get there.
#8 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#9 - Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
#10 - Lately, I've noticed people my age are so much older than me
. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more c... (
show quote)
All true BB, and I love the condom one LMAO!
Huntm22
Loc: Northern Utah. - West Haven
All good! Some remind me of meπ€ͺ
badbobby wrote:
. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the idiot's name.(it is BadFisherman)
3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then, neither does milk.
5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
*BONUS RULES:*
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
And as I get older, I realize:
#1 - I talk to myself, because there are times I need expert advice.
#2 - I consider "On Trend" to be the clothes that still fit.
#3 - I don't need anger management. People need to stop pissing me off.
#4 - My people skills are just fine. My tolerance for idiots needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."
#6 - I have days when my life is just a tent away from a circus.
#7 - These days, "on time" is when I get there.
#8 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#9 - Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
#10 - Lately, I've noticed people my age are so much older than me
. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more c... (
show quote)
Good stuff right there. Thanks for the laughs.
They are safe if you are the husband.
Good ones BB, very relatable
bahmer
Loc: Northern Illinois Rockford
badbobby wrote:
. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than on a bicycle.
2. Forgive your enemy - but remember the idiot's name.(it is BadFisherman)
3. If you help someone when they're in trouble - they will remember you when they're in trouble again.
4. Alcohol does not solve any problems - but then, neither does milk.
5. Many people are alive only because it's illegal to shoot them.
*~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*
*BONUS RULES:*
Condoms do not guarantee safe sex. A friend of mine was wearing one when he was shot by the woman's husband.
And as I get older, I realize:
#1 - I talk to myself, because there are times I need expert advice.
#2 - I consider "On Trend" to be the clothes that still fit.
#3 - I don't need anger management. People need to stop pissing me off.
#4 - My people skills are just fine. My tolerance for idiots needs work.
#5 - The biggest lie I tell myself is, "I don't need to write that down. I'll remember it."
#6 - I have days when my life is just a tent away from a circus.
#7 - These days, "on time" is when I get there.
#8 - Even duct tape can't fix stupid - but it sure does muffle the sound.
#9 - Wouldn't it be wonderful if we could put ourselves in the dryer for ten minutes, then come out wrinkle-free and three sizes smaller?
#10 - Lately, I've noticed people my age are so much older than me
. Money cannot buy happiness - but it's far more c... (
show quote)
Spot on there badbobby thanks for the words of wisdom.πππππ
Jeremy wrote:
They are safe if you are the husband.
If you are a husband and don't stray you don't need one. It's like taking a shower with a raincoat on!
You know, a bunch of these are keepers! Well done, my friend.
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