Good morning 12/25/23
Dec 25, 2023 06:05:19 #
Merry Christmas everyone!
Did Santa make it to your house??
I'm going to go outside as soon as it gets light to see how bad he tore up the yard since it's 43° and nothing but mud!! Actually we should see about 55° later.
Here's some Santa chuckles for you:
How do you wash your hands over the holiday? With Santatizer.
Why don’t you ever see Santa in a hospital? Because he has private elf care.
Why is Santa afraid of getting stuck in a chimney? He has Claus-trophobia.
Why does Santa have three gardens? So he can ho ho ho.
What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack.
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing. It was on the house.
How can you tell that Santa is real? You can always sense his presents.
Why will Santa go down your chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him.
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsillitis!
What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
What happened to the man who stole an Advent Calendar? He got 25 days.
What’s the most popular Christmas wine? “But I don’t like Brussels sprouts!”
How does Christmas Day end? With the letter Y!
What do you get when you combine a Christmas tree with an iPad? A pineapple.
Who is never hungry at Christmas? The turkey—he’s always stuffed.
I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She told me that nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace. So I bought her nothing.
My friend just won the tallest Christmas tree competition. I thought to myself, ‘How can you top that?’
A gingerbread man went to the doctor’s complaining of a sore knee. The doctor asked him. “Have you tried icing it?”
Enjoy the day, act like kids, but remember the real reason for this day. Celebrate the birth of our savior!
Merry Christmas!!
Did Santa make it to your house??
I'm going to go outside as soon as it gets light to see how bad he tore up the yard since it's 43° and nothing but mud!! Actually we should see about 55° later.
Here's some Santa chuckles for you:
How do you wash your hands over the holiday? With Santatizer.
Why don’t you ever see Santa in a hospital? Because he has private elf care.
Why is Santa afraid of getting stuck in a chimney? He has Claus-trophobia.
Why does Santa have three gardens? So he can ho ho ho.
What does Santa do when his elves misbehave? He gives them the sack.
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus.
What nationality is Santa Claus?
North Polish.
How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? Nothing. It was on the house.
How can you tell that Santa is real? You can always sense his presents.
Why will Santa go down your chimney on Christmas Eve? Because it soots him.
What do you get if you eat Christmas decorations? Tinsillitis!
What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.
What happened to the man who stole an Advent Calendar? He got 25 days.
What’s the most popular Christmas wine? “But I don’t like Brussels sprouts!”
How does Christmas Day end? With the letter Y!
What do you get when you combine a Christmas tree with an iPad? A pineapple.
Who is never hungry at Christmas? The turkey—he’s always stuffed.
I asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She told me that nothing would make her happier than a diamond necklace. So I bought her nothing.
My friend just won the tallest Christmas tree competition. I thought to myself, ‘How can you top that?’
A gingerbread man went to the doctor’s complaining of a sore knee. The doctor asked him. “Have you tried icing it?”
Enjoy the day, act like kids, but remember the real reason for this day. Celebrate the birth of our savior!
Merry Christmas!!
Dec 25, 2023 06:11:51 #
Slimshady
Loc: Central Pennsylvania
Good morning Doug and all to follow and a very Merry Christmas to all. Got some good one liners there Doug
Dec 25, 2023 06:43:57 #
Grizzly 17
Loc: South central Pa
Doug Lemmon wrote:
Merry Christmas everyone! br br Did Santa make... (show quote)
Gmorn Doug n Y'all
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE
Enjoy the day stay safe brothers n sisters 👍😊
Good ones Doug 👍
Dec 25, 2023 06:45:33 #
Grizzly 17
Loc: South central Pa
Slimshady wrote:
Good morning Doug and all to follow and a very Merry Christmas to all. Got some good one liners there Doug
MERRY CHRISTMAS to Y'all Slim
I'll be there in SPIRIT BROTHER 😊😊
Dec 25, 2023 06:46:40 #
Good morning Doug, Slim and all. Those were some great dry funnies there Doug. Just put a 10# brisket in the oven, got to bake 9 hours or so, some smoked salmon and pheasant will round out the appetizers. I love Thanksgiving but am not a huge fan of the traditional turkey so am really looking forward to the feast today. Merry Christmas to all and hope everyone has a great and blessed day!
Dec 25, 2023 07:16:47 #
Doug Lemmon wrote:
Merry Christmas everyone! br br Did Santa make... (show quote)
Good morning and Merry Christmas Doug and the morning Crew. Not that we need another reason to start the day with a smile Doug, some good ones there this morning well worth a smile and a chuckle too.
May you all have a Blessed Christmas Day.
Dec 25, 2023 07:31:41 #
dbed
Loc: POMME DE TERRE LAKE MISSOURI
Good morning everyone Merry Christmas 43 dropping to 36 by 6:00
Dec 25, 2023 07:56:05 #
Good morning boys and girls and Merry Christmas It's 44° and going to a high of 64° today with a chance of scattered showers this afternoon and rain is 100% for tonight. Cooking a Rib roast for lunch today. I hope everyone has a blessed day ✌️
Dec 25, 2023 08:40:37 #
Good morning all. Chilly 41 and climbing to 64 wind at 10mph with a 65% chance of rain. Merry Christmas to all. Good to see Slim back. Meeting at the Still later to test Doug new batch. Plum slept down there right next to the fire. He was waiting for the first drop.
Dec 25, 2023 09:05:52 #
troyfrd1 wrote:
Good morning all. Chilly 41 and climbing to 64 wind at 10mph with a 65% chance of rain. Merry Christmas to all. Good to see Slim back. Meeting at the Still later to test Doug new batch. Plum slept down there right next to the fire. He was waiting for the first drop.
There's enough boogie woogie in this batch that Plum's shoes will dance by themselves!! 👞 🍸 👞 🍸
Dec 25, 2023 09:07:01 #
Doug Lemmon wrote:
Merry Christmas everyone! br br Did Santa make... (show quote)
Good morning Doug and Merry Christmas to you and everyone.
39° foggy and damp here, going up to 49° with showers later. Enjoy your Christmas day everybody.
Dec 25, 2023 09:54:04 #
Dec 25, 2023 10:10:11 #
kandydisbar
Loc: West Orange, NJ
Doug Lemmon wrote:
Merry Christmas everyone! br br Did Santa make... (show quote)
What a barrage of punnies! Couple new ones, thanks! Hope your Day is Blessed. and all the rest of you folks too!!
Dec 25, 2023 10:20:37 #
Doug Lemmon wrote:
Merry Christmas everyone! br br Did Santa make... (show quote)
Doug, you missed one
What did Santa start singing when his dog came running to him from the beach?
Here comes sandy paws, here comes sandy paws
Dec 25, 2023 10:21:19 #
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