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Jul 19, 2022 19:36:37   #
hacksaw Loc: Pasadena, Texas
 
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government hospital. Wait! What!
Hack ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿบ

(Actual writings from hospital charts)

1. The patient refused an autopsy.


2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.


3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.


4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.


6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared


7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.


8 The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.


9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.


10. Healthy appearing decrepit 66-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.


11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.


12. She is numb from her toes down.


13. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.


14. The skin was moist and dry.


15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.


16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.


17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.


18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.


19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.


20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.


21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.


22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

Reply
Jul 19, 2022 20:11:30   #
Slimshady Loc: Central Pennsylvania
 
Oh boy.

Reply
Jul 19, 2022 20:33:14   #
Huntm22 Loc: Northern Utah. - West Haven
 
And my grandaughter work for the VA care center - says she has heard of and seen some doozies!!

Reply
 
 
Jul 19, 2022 20:45:24   #
Jwid Loc: Lake Killarney, Ironton, MO
 
hacksaw wrote:
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government hospital. Wait! What!
Hack ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿบ

(Actual writings from hospital charts)

1. The patient refused an autopsy.


2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.


3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.


4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.


6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared


7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.


8 The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.


9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.


10. Healthy appearing decrepit 66-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.


11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.


12. She is numb from her toes down.


13. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.


14. The skin was moist and dry.


15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.


16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.


17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.


18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.


19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.


20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.


21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.


22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government h... (show quote)


Number 21. Thatโ€™s what she said!

Good stuff Hack!

Reply
Jul 19, 2022 21:09:55   #
hacksaw Loc: Pasadena, Texas
 
Huntm22 wrote:
And my grandaughter work for the VA care center - says she has heard of and seen some doozies!!


I donโ€™t doubt sheโ€™s seen everything at the VA. They are a fun bunch to watch sometimes.
Hack ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿบ

Reply
Jul 19, 2022 21:22:59   #
Gordon Loc: Charleston South Carolina
 
Slimshady wrote:
Oh boy.


Good ones Hack.

Reply
Jul 19, 2022 21:52:12   #
DCGravity Loc: Fairfax, VA (by way of Cleveland OH)
 
God help us!!

Reply
 
 
Jul 20, 2022 06:04:00   #
OJdidit Loc: Oak Creek Wisconsin
 
Yikes!

Reply
Jul 20, 2022 07:52:58   #
bknecht Loc: Northeast pa
 
hacksaw wrote:
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government hospital. Wait! What!
Hack ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿบ

(Actual writings from hospital charts)

1. The patient refused an autopsy.


2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

Some funny stuff there Hack.
3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.


4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.


6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared


7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.


8 The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.


9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.


10. Healthy appearing decrepit 66-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.


11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.


12. She is numb from her toes down.


13. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.


14. The skin was moist and dry.


15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.


16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.


17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.


18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.


19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.


20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.


21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.


22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government h... (show quote)

Reply
Jul 20, 2022 08:49:15   #
Frank romero Loc: Clovis, NM
 
Good ones

Reply
Jul 20, 2022 08:58:11   #
ghaynes1 Loc: Strawberry Plains, TN
 
Funny stuff. #18 - so that's what cured my constipation twice - divorce - who knew?

Reply
 
 
Jul 20, 2022 09:38:12   #
Papa Jack Loc: Indianapolis
 
hacksaw wrote:
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government hospital. Wait! What!
Hack ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿบ

(Actual writings from hospital charts)

1. The patient refused an autopsy.


2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.


3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.


4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.


6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared


7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.


8 The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.


9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.


10. Healthy appearing decrepit 66-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.


11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.


12. She is numb from her toes down.


13. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.


14. The skin was moist and dry.


15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.


16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.


17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.


18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.


19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.


20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.


21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.


22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government h... (show quote)


LOL and these were written byโ€educatedโ€ people

Reply
Jul 20, 2022 10:08:14   #
BongsonBob Loc: East Bay
 
Last week I had spine surgery at VAMCSF, spent two nights, and made it home alive.

Reply
Jul 20, 2022 13:30:07   #
HenryG Loc: Falmouth Cape Cod Massachusetts
 
hacksaw wrote:
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government hospital. Wait! What!
Hack ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿบ

(Actual writings from hospital charts)

1. The patient refused an autopsy.


2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.


3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.


4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.


6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared


7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.


8 The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.


9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.


10. Healthy appearing decrepit 66-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.


11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.


12. She is numb from her toes down.


13. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.


14. The skin was moist and dry.


15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.


16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.


17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.


18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.


19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.


20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.


21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.


22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government h... (show quote)


Glad I don't get sick ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐ŸŽฃ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ‘

Reply
Jul 20, 2022 17:30:56   #
Kerry Hansen Loc: Bremerton, WA
 
hacksaw wrote:
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government hospital. Wait! What!
Hack ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ฆ๐Ÿบ

(Actual writings from hospital charts)

1. The patient refused an autopsy.


2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.


3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.


4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.


6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared


7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.


8 The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.


9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.


10. Healthy appearing decrepit 66-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.


11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.


12. She is numb from her toes down.


13. While in ER, she was examined, X-rated and sent home.


14. The skin was moist and dry.


15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.


16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.


17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.


18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life, until she got a divorce.


19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.


20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.


21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.


22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
All I can think is I'm glad I go to a government h... (show quote)


Hack that was funny, my Nurse Wife got a kick out of it.

Reply
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