badbobby Loc: Humble Texas

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in south eastern Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into Hacksaw's field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, Hack drove up in his pickup and asked him what he was doing.

The litigator responded, "I shot a duck and it fell in this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."


But Hack said, "This is my property, and you are not coming over here."

The indignant lawyer said, "I am one of the best trial attorneys in the United States and, if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own.

Hack just smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we settle disputes down here in Texas. We settle small disagreements like this with the "Three Kick Rule."

The lawyer asked, "What is the Three Kick Rule?"

Hack replied, "Well, because the dispute occurs on my land, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone gives up."

The attorney(standing 6 foot 3 and 240 pounds) quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take Hack. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

Hack slowly climbed outta his truck and walked up to the attorney.
His first kick planted the toe of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last meal gushing from his mouth.

The lawyer was on all fours when Hack's third kick to his rear end sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet. Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said, "Okay, Now it's my turn."

But Hack just smiled and said, "Naw, I give up. You can have the stupid duck."

CamT Loc: La Porte, Texas

That Hack is a crafty ole guy🤣

Spiritof27 Loc: Lincoln, CA

want you to know I haven't even read your post yet, just the subject line got me to chuckling. quit it!

Fredfish Loc: Prospect CT.

You gotta watch Hack, he's a crafty devil.
Good one Bobby.

florida Loc: Southwest Florida/ Virginia

I look forward to your additions everyday, they are Great and keep us thinking of good times.

Slimshady Loc: Central Pennsylvania

Got one for sure

Barnacles Loc: Northern California

This is interesting: In today's politically correct world, you're branded a racist if you tell a joke about someone of another race, or even just mention that the person isn't of your own race. If you tell a joke that involves a woman, you're sexist. The list goes on and on, you can't hardly say anything without offending SOMEone. But you can say anything you like about attorneys, and everyone smiles!

stuco Loc: Northern Utah - Salt Lake City

Good one as always sir!

Pixiedog456005 Loc: Maryland

Always loved that one.
Thanks 4d chuckle this late night.
GoGoGo!

Doug Lemmon Loc: Rochester Mills, PA

Wonder if the lawyer ever goes huntin again?? LOL!!

Pixiedog456005 Loc: Maryland

Never with Channey

BonitaBarry Loc: Bonita Springs, FL

I’m grinning from ear to ear! Starting my day off on a positive note!😁😎

Harris T. Fudpucker Loc: Lafayette, Louisiana

Anyone that gets the best of a lawyer has my vote! Well done

RuffplayOR57 Loc: Klamath Falls, OR

Years ago a friend of mine was a witness in a court case. The attorney approached him and ask him a question, and my friend thought for a few seconds before he was going to give an answer. At this point the attorney demanded the judge to make the witness answer, so the judge ask my friend What the problem was with him not answering. My friend then explain to the judge, well Your Honor, I’m not an attorney and I try to think before I speak!

Harris T. Fudpucker Loc: Lafayette, Louisiana

i was put on the stand for a murder, that I knew something about. The only person that didn't know me, was the prosecuting attorney. Ha, he asked me to explain the gun that was used in the murder. I then corrected him, and told him it was a weapon, and for him to call it so. He asked for a recess, and took me out and chewed my ass for correcting him. I said if he is that stupid to chew me out, I will continue. So the next question was the telescope that he used. I told him it was called a scope, he turned beet red, bit his tongue and said he stands corrected. The whole courtroom was laughing at him. The judge was a friend of mine, and was smiling from ear to ear.