More Blonde Jokes
Dec 12, 2020 22:36:24 #
Video Bob
Loc: Norfolk, Va
What's a blonde's idea of safe sex?
Lock the car door!
How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
There's white-out on the screen.
How can you tell that a blonde sent the fax you're looking at?
There's a stamp on it.
How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
Shine a flashlight in her ear!
Why shouldn't blondes be allowed to take coffee breaks?
It takes too long to re-train them.
What's the mating call of a blonde?
“I'm Sooooo drunk!”
What's the mating call of a brunette?
“All the blondes have gone home!”
Why does a blonde keep a coat hanger under the seat of her car?
In case she locks the keys inside.
Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency?
They can't remember the number.
Clairol said that blondes have more fun. Is that true??
Yes! They're easier to find in the dark!
How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
One. She holds the bulb while the world revolves around her.
Why did the blonde climb over the chain-link fence?
To see what was on the other side.
Why can't a blonde double a recipe?
Because the oven knob doesn't go up to 700 degrees.
What's the blonde's job in the M&M factory?
Proofreading.
How can you keep a blonde busy for hours?
Write “please turn over” on both sides of a piece of paper.
What do you call 10 blondes standing ear-to-ear?
A wind tunnel.
Who is the blonde skeleton in the closet?
Last years' hide-and-seek champ.
How did the blonde break her leg raking the leaves?
She fell out of the tree.
How do you check a blonde's I.Q?
With a tire gauge.
Why would a blonde wear her hair in a pony tail?
To hide the valve stem.
What do you see when you look into a blonde's eyes?
The back of her head.
How can you tell that a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
By the M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.
Lock the car door!
How can you tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
There's white-out on the screen.
How can you tell that a blonde sent the fax you're looking at?
There's a stamp on it.
How do you make a blonde's eyes light up?
Shine a flashlight in her ear!
Why shouldn't blondes be allowed to take coffee breaks?
It takes too long to re-train them.
What's the mating call of a blonde?
“I'm Sooooo drunk!”
What's the mating call of a brunette?
“All the blondes have gone home!”
Why does a blonde keep a coat hanger under the seat of her car?
In case she locks the keys inside.
Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency?
They can't remember the number.
Clairol said that blondes have more fun. Is that true??
Yes! They're easier to find in the dark!
How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb?
One. She holds the bulb while the world revolves around her.
Why did the blonde climb over the chain-link fence?
To see what was on the other side.
Why can't a blonde double a recipe?
Because the oven knob doesn't go up to 700 degrees.
What's the blonde's job in the M&M factory?
Proofreading.
How can you keep a blonde busy for hours?
Write “please turn over” on both sides of a piece of paper.
What do you call 10 blondes standing ear-to-ear?
A wind tunnel.
Who is the blonde skeleton in the closet?
Last years' hide-and-seek champ.
How did the blonde break her leg raking the leaves?
She fell out of the tree.
How do you check a blonde's I.Q?
With a tire gauge.
Why would a blonde wear her hair in a pony tail?
To hide the valve stem.
What do you see when you look into a blonde's eyes?
The back of her head.
How can you tell that a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
By the M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.
Dec 13, 2020 00:11:27 #
Dec 13, 2020 04:29:35 #
Dec 13, 2020 08:20:15 #
Dec 13, 2020 08:55:20 #
I'm with Egg. Some new ones there. The tree one i can picture that in my mind.
Dec 13, 2020 10:39:32 #
Egghead wrote:
🤣😆 LMAO, there's some I haven't heard. Thanks for the laugh Bob.
Yep there’s some new ones. Also LMAO.
Dec 13, 2020 12:51:17 #
Oil scout
Loc: Slidell, LA
And the blonde's comeback.
Why are blonde jokes so short?
So brunettes can remember them.
Why are blonde jokes so short?
So brunettes can remember them.
Dec 13, 2020 15:57:38 #
Video Bob wrote:
What's a blonde's idea of safe sex? br Lock the ca... (show quote)
So, so many good ones! I like the M&M shells and the oven knob not going up to 700°...but the Hide 'n Seek champ rolls me, too..thanks!
Here's one: Blonde walks into the library and says to the front desk attendant, "I'd like a Cheeseburger and Fries"...desk clerk says, "Mam, this is a library"...blonde then WHISPERS, "oh, I'd like a Cheeseburger and Fries"..🤣(this one's definitely better in person)
Dec 13, 2020 16:34:54 #
captjim
Loc: Antioch Ca
I remember seeing a quote from Dolly Parton, when asked if she gets mad at dumb blonde jokes. Her answer, " I don't get upset because I know I am neither."
Dec 13, 2020 16:51:35 #
captjim wrote:
I remember seeing a quote from Dolly Parton, when asked if she gets mad at dumb blonde jokes. Her answer, " I don't get upset because I know I am neither."
Dec 13, 2020 16:54:12 #
(oops...guess Quick reply is a bit different)
My reply:
That's Dolly! What a hoot ~ I heard her say
"costs a lot of money to look this cheap"
My reply:
That's Dolly! What a hoot ~ I heard her say
"costs a lot of money to look this cheap"
Dec 13, 2020 17:16:59 #
fisher
Loc: whitewater,colorado
GirlsJustWannaCatchThatBIGone wrote:
So, so many good ones! I like the M&M shells and the oven knob not going up to 700°...but the Hide 'n Seek champ rolls me, too..thanks!
Here's one: Blonde walks into the library and says to the front desk attendant, "I'd like a Cheeseburger and Fries"...desk clerk says, "Mam, this is a library"...blonde then WHISPERS, "oh, I'd like a Cheeseburger and Fries"..🤣(this one's definitely better in person)
Here's one: Blonde walks into the library and says to the front desk attendant, "I'd like a Cheeseburger and Fries"...desk clerk says, "Mam, this is a library"...blonde then WHISPERS, "oh, I'd like a Cheeseburger and Fries"..🤣(this one's definitely better in person)
A blonde lady goes ice fishing. She pulls her sled out onto the ice and begins to bore a hole in the ice with an auger when she hears a loud voice from somewhere say "no fish under the ice". She thinks it must be a bad spot so she goes 27 feet and 3/4" feet and starts to drill again and hears " no fish under the ice" - rats!!! She moves 42 feet and 1/2" and begins to drill a hole when she hears " lady I'm the manager of the ice rink and I'm telling ya there's no fish under the ice.
Dec 13, 2020 19:09:55 #
Dec 13, 2020 21:24:31 #
Dec 14, 2020 04:46:58 #
dbed wrote:
blonde jokes,the only jokes not called racist
that's cause they're about white chicks
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