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Three stories taken from BB's Fascinating life
Oct 3, 2020 07:59:35   #
BadFisherman Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
BadBobby was a God-fearing man, but when it came to cursing, he was as intemperate as he was forcible. He had a talent for it. BB’s oaths got to be infamous, so when folks got their dander up, they’d stop in and have him supply the high-quality abusive language that they were after.

One spring, BB planted blueberry bushes in his meadow. A week later, he went to check their progress and found that some beavers had built a dam that put a pond over the new planting. Well! He let out a whoop that turned three flocks of migrating birds back south again. The language wasn’t blue; it was positively purple. The beavers came out, took the dam apart, and moved it 2 miles upstream. Our Ancient Mariner kept railing. The maple trees started pouring out sap into buckets, and when that didn’t help, they pumped out preformed maple sugar candies in the shapes of heroes from Vermont history. The beavers took apart the second dam and cut and stacked two cords of firewood.

It seemed like nothing would stop BB, but eventually he left off, although he claimed that he still had plenty of new and interesting things to say. Even those berry bushes were mightily impressed. The next summer, all BB had to do was to hold a basket under a bush and sneer, and the blueberries would jump right in.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The most fascinating tale I ever heard was about BadBobby fishing at a lake. His eye caught a gray squirrel in the trees near the shore. The tree limbs hung over the lake. In the lake was a stump with two nuts on it. The squirrel was desperately trying all of his acrobatic gyrations in an effort to reach the nuts. Just as he grabbed them, he lost his grip and fell into the water. Instantly the biggest fish BB had ever seen lunged up and swallowed the squirrel. The lake got calm again. Then the big fish jumped up out of the water and put the two nuts back on the stump.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

BadBobby was once a farmer who owned an old mule with a large, open sore on his back. Unable to heal the sore, BB turned the mule out to pasture for his final days. Winters came and went with no sign of the old mule, so The Ol' Feller assumed that he had died.

Then, one fall day, BB set out to hunt for squirrels. To his amazement, he saw something that looked like a tree moving. Upon closer inspection, he discovered the old mule walking along with a large oak and a smaller maple growing from his back. It seemed that an acorn and a maple seed had fallen into the sore on the mule’s back, taken root, and grown. So, being a resourceful man, BB cut down the oak tree and whittled a beautiful saddle from the stump. To this day, BadBobby can often be seen riding through his fields on the old mule. He left the maple tree standing, because he liked to ride in the shade.

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Oct 3, 2020 08:17:42   #
dbed Loc: POMME DE TERRE LAKE MISSOURI
 
Good stories bf

Reply
Oct 3, 2020 08:24:02   #
Gordon Loc: Charleston South Carolina
 
Them true stories,Right?

Reply
 
 
Oct 3, 2020 08:37:57   #
JKD
 
Love em!!!

Reply
Oct 3, 2020 08:38:09   #
BadFisherman Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
Gordon wrote:
Them true stories,Right?

Mayhaps, as I heard 'em straight from BB.

Reply
Oct 3, 2020 10:02:48   #
bahmer Loc: Northern Illinois Rockford
 
BadFisherman wrote:
BadBobby was a God-fearing man, but when it came to cursing, he was as intemperate as he was forcible. He had a talent for it. BB’s oaths got to be infamous, so when folks got their dander up, they’d stop in and have him supply the high-quality abusive language that they were after.

One spring, BB planted blueberry bushes in his meadow. A week later, he went to check their progress and found that some beavers had built a dam that put a pond over the new planting. Well! He let out a whoop that turned three flocks of migrating birds back south again. The language wasn’t blue; it was positively purple. The beavers came out, took the dam apart, and moved it 2 miles upstream. Our Ancient Mariner kept railing. The maple trees started pouring out sap into buckets, and when that didn’t help, they pumped out preformed maple sugar candies in the shapes of heroes from Vermont history. The beavers took apart the second dam and cut and stacked two cords of firewood.

It seemed like nothing would stop BB, but eventually he left off, although he claimed that he still had plenty of new and interesting things to say. Even those berry bushes were mightily impressed. The next summer, all BB had to do was to hold a basket under a bush and sneer, and the blueberries would jump right in.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The most fascinating tale I ever heard was about BadBobby fishing at a lake. His eye caught a gray squirrel in the trees near the shore. The tree limbs hung over the lake. In the lake was a stump with two nuts on it. The squirrel was desperately trying all of his acrobatic gyrations in an effort to reach the nuts. Just as he grabbed them, he lost his grip and fell into the water. Instantly the biggest fish BB had ever seen lunged up and swallowed the squirrel. The lake got calm again. Then the big fish jumped up out of the water and put the two nuts back on the stump.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

BadBobby was once a farmer who owned an old mule with a large, open sore on his back. Unable to heal the sore, BB turned the mule out to pasture for his final days. Winters came and went with no sign of the old mule, so The Ol' Feller assumed that he had died.

Then, one fall day, BB set out to hunt for squirrels. To his amazement, he saw something that looked like a tree moving. Upon closer inspection, he discovered the old mule walking along with a large oak and a smaller maple growing from his back. It seemed that an acorn and a maple seed had fallen into the sore on the mule’s back, taken root, and grown. So, being a resourceful man, BB cut down the oak tree and whittled a beautiful saddle from the stump. To this day, BadBobby can often be seen riding through his fields on the old mule. He left the maple tree standing, because he liked to ride in the shade.
BadBobby was a God-fearing man, but when it came t... (show quote)


Good ones there BF thanks for the laughs.

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Oct 3, 2020 19:24:48   #
Barnacles Loc: Northern California
 
My Granddad told me about a camping trip he was on up in North Dakota.
"It was late in the fall, but we went anyway. The first evening, we were getting supper ready, and had a big kettle of water boiling over the campfire. Suddenly the wind came up and the temperature began to drop. It got SO cold SO fast that when the water in that kettle froze, the ice was still hot!"

Reply
 
 
Oct 3, 2020 19:32:59   #
Gordon Loc: Charleston South Carolina
 
Barnacles wrote:
My Granddad told me about a camping trip he was on up in North Dakota.
"It was late in the fall, but we went anyway. The first evening, we were getting supper ready, and had a big kettle of water boiling over the campfire. Suddenly the wind came up and the temperature began to drop. It got SO cold SO fast that when the water in that kettle froze, the ice was still hot!"


So thats what its like if Hell freezes over. I dont want to go camping there.

Reply
Oct 3, 2020 21:46:05   #
Barnacles Loc: Northern California
 
Granddad liked to mess with his grand kids. He had some really implausible stories!

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Oct 3, 2020 22:06:23   #
BadFisherman Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
Barnacles wrote:
Granddad liked to mess with his grand kids. He had some really implausible stories!

That's some of what we grandpas do.

Reply
Oct 5, 2020 14:52:46   #
badbobby Loc: Humble Texas
 
BadFisherman wrote:
BadBobby was a God-fearing man, but when it came to cursing, he was as intemperate as he was forcible. He had a talent for it. BB’s oaths got to be infamous, so when folks got their dander up, they’d stop in and have him supply the high-quality abusive language that they were after.

One spring, BB planted blueberry bushes in his meadow. A week later, he went to check their progress and found that some beavers had built a dam that put a pond over the new planting. Well! He let out a whoop that turned three flocks of migrating birds back south again. The language wasn’t blue; it was positively purple. The beavers came out, took the dam apart, and moved it 2 miles upstream. Our Ancient Mariner kept railing. The maple trees started pouring out sap into buckets, and when that didn’t help, they pumped out preformed maple sugar candies in the shapes of heroes from Vermont history. The beavers took apart the second dam and cut and stacked two cords of firewood.

It seemed like nothing would stop BB, but eventually he left off, although he claimed that he still had plenty of new and interesting things to say. Even those berry bushes were mightily impressed. The next summer, all BB had to do was to hold a basket under a bush and sneer, and the blueberries would jump right in.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

The most fascinating tale I ever heard was about BadBobby fishing at a lake. His eye caught a gray squirrel in the trees near the shore. The tree limbs hung over the lake. In the lake was a stump with two nuts on it. The squirrel was desperately trying all of his acrobatic gyrations in an effort to reach the nuts. Just as he grabbed them, he lost his grip and fell into the water. Instantly the biggest fish BB had ever seen lunged up and swallowed the squirrel. The lake got calm again. Then the big fish jumped up out of the water and put the two nuts back on the stump.
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

BadBobby was once a farmer who owned an old mule with a large, open sore on his back. Unable to heal the sore, BB turned the mule out to pasture for his final days. Winters came and went with no sign of the old mule, so The Ol' Feller assumed that he had died.

Then, one fall day, BB set out to hunt for squirrels. To his amazement, he saw something that looked like a tree moving. Upon closer inspection, he discovered the old mule walking along with a large oak and a smaller maple growing from his back. It seemed that an acorn and a maple seed had fallen into the sore on the mule’s back, taken root, and grown. So, being a resourceful man, BB cut down the oak tree and whittled a beautiful saddle from the stump. To this day, BadBobby can often be seen riding through his fields on the old mule. He left the maple tree standing, because he liked to ride in the shade.
BadBobby was a God-fearing man, but when it came t... (show quote)


wow I knew I was good
but wow!!!

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Oct 5, 2020 15:27:59   #
BadFisherman Loc: Lake Whitney, Texas
 
badbobby wrote:
wow I knew I was good
but wow!!!

Oh, Lord. Now you're gon'na be even harder with whom to tolerate being around.

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