Any attorney out there?
Dec 25, 2019 20:02:37 #
r one rule for attorneys at trial is,...
NEVER ask a question you don't know the answer to!
This is good for a laugh.
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Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
NEVER ask a question you don't know the answer to!
This is good for a laugh.
-------------------------------------------
Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, 'Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a
youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said,
'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.
Dec 25, 2019 20:16:23 #
Thats a good one. I,m never going to that town. Whatever the name of it is.
Dec 25, 2019 20:38:16 #
Gordon wrote:
Thats a good one. I,m never going to that town. Whatever the name of it is.
I'm never going to Levy Co. FL., I may never go to FL.
Dec 25, 2019 21:11:56 #
Dec 26, 2019 07:21:31 #
Dec 26, 2019 07:23:59 #
Raw Dawg Ron
Loc: St. Petersburg, FL
Come on grandma, don`t tell all your secretes! Jest enough to keep-em on their toes.
Dec 26, 2019 08:27:20 #
The story couldn't be told about a nicer group of people! Right on GRANDMA!
Dec 26, 2019 10:33:13 #
Dec 26, 2019 11:00:34 #
ghost of jonah
Loc: algonquin, illinois
How do you save a lawyer from drowning? Take your foot off his neck.
Dec 26, 2019 11:11:51 #
ghost of jonah wrote:
How do you save a lawyer from drowning? Take your foot off his neck.
May as well just keep it there ghost, can't feed 'em to the Sharks. Sharks won't eat 'em. Professional Courtesy!
Dec 26, 2019 11:29:04 #
Dec 26, 2019 15:33:33 #
Dec 27, 2019 17:53:40 #
john1470
Loc: Sandy Hook, CT
What yah got when yah have a six foot attorney standing in five of water? Not nuff water!
Dec 27, 2019 17:55:31 #
john1470
Loc: Sandy Hook, CT
What cha got when u have a six foot attorney standing in five feet of water? Not nuff water!
Dec 27, 2019 18:01:50 #
john1470 wrote:
If you knock him off his feet will it raise the water level enuff? Just askin'..........What cha got when u have a six foot attorney standing in five feet of water? Not nuff water!
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