Ronniejw Loc: West Point MS

A gentleman entered a busy florist shop that displayed a large sign that read “Say It With Flowers.”

“Wrap up one rose,” he told the florist.

“Only one?” the florist asked.

“Just one,” the customer replied. “I’m a man of few words.”


A married couple was watching volleyball game at a beach when the wife spotted a couple in the bleachers. They were being very affectionate. The girl was running her hands all over the boyfriend and nibbling on his ear. He had his hands on her chest.

Looking at them, the wife said to her husband “I don’t know whether to watch them or the game.”

Husband said, “Better watch them! You already know how to play volleyball.”

Andy cacciatori Loc: Modesto cal.

Liked 👍
Have a good day
Andy

HenryG Loc: Falmouth Cape Cod Massachusetts

😂👍

HenryG Loc: Falmouth Cape Cod Massachusetts

I use to cough to cover up the sound of my farts now I fart to cover up the sound of my coughs

badbobby Loc: Humble Texas

wow Ron!!
you are a brave man
these ladies can be dangerous

Slimshady Loc: Central Pennsylvania

Got one. Reminds me of the guy that came home after work on his anniversary with a bunch of roses. As his wife was putting them in a vase she counted them. She said honey we have been married for 37 years but you only brought 24 roses. He said yep. One for every year of HAPPY marriage

Big A Loc: Mesa, Arizona

On the 'one rose' - Sometimes
that one rose can be more
eloquent than DOZENS of
roses; it tells her that she is
'that one special girl who holds
a very special place in your heart,
to the exclusion of all others' !

To the '24 out of 37 roses' - he
is currently in ICU - hospital
visiting hours are from 9:00 AM
to 9:00 PM !
(Just goes to show that 'no good
deed ever goes unpunished' !)

badbobby Loc: Humble Texas

you're stinkin up the Stage HG

HenryG Loc: Falmouth Cape Cod Massachusetts

Glad to oblige

Billycrap2 Loc: Mason county,W(BY GOD) Virginia, 🇺🇸🦅

Big A Loc: Mesa, Arizona

(Bear with me - it's only humor !)

Consider yourselves lucky it isn't me from 'back in the day', as I had quite the reputation for stinking up the neighborhood ! Fortunately (or unfortunately, depending on point
of view), that has faded to nearly unnoticeable ! Although this is
written as humor, it is ALL true !
(Remember - I have warned our members about my warped sense
of humor !)

Remarks heard in passing -
1- He could gag a maggot !
2- He could make a billygoat puke !
3- He could put a skunk to shame !
4- He could make an onion cry !
5- He could blister paint off a wall !
6- THAT guy ? He could make
a BAG of onions cry !
7- You should bottle that and sell
it to the military as a weapon !
(Oh, wait ! Aren't biological
weapons banned ?)

That's just the remarks from friends and neighbors; the facts are -
1- Cleared a room of ten people in
ten seconds (or less) !
2- Cleared an outdoor picnic table
in a ten-knot wind !
3- Literally made someone puke !

I miss those days - I was always taught to share, so I would have
chili and beer on Saturday followed
by a bowl of ice cream (deadly combo), then share it with everyone on Sunday (or sometimes on the same night) !
Now ? - NOTHING NOTICEABLE !
(I guess the fun's over, EH ?)

kandydisbar Loc: West Orange, NJ

First one very cute!

HenryG Loc: Falmouth Cape Cod Massachusetts

😂👍

badbobby Loc: Humble Texas

if I din't know better
I'd think Big was braggin

Big A Loc: Mesa, Arizona

Nope ! Just the facts, sir !
Just the facts ! But I do
miss 'sharing' !