1--my mother taught me to appreciate a job well done
"if you are going to kill each other do it outside I just finished cleaning
2--mother taught me religion
"you better pray that comes out of that carpet"
3--mother taught me time travel
"if you don't straighten up Im gonna knock you into the middle of next week"
4--mother taught me logic
"because I said so that's why"
5 mother taught me more logic
"if you fall outta that swing and break your neck you cant go with me"
6--mother taught me foresight
"make sure you have on clean underwear in case you have an accident"
7--mother taught me irony
"keep up that cryin and Ill give you something to cry about"
8--mother taught me osmosis
"shut your mouth and eat your supper"
9--mother taught me tortionism
"will you look at the dirt on the back of your neck?"
10--mother taught me stamina
"you will sit there until all that spinach is gone"
11--mother taught me about weather
"your room looks like a tornado hit it"
12--mother taught me hypocrisy
"if I told you once I told you a million times,dont exaggerate"
13--mother taught me about the circle of life
"I brought you into this world and I can take you out"
14--mother taught me behavior modification
"stop acting like your father"
15
--mother taught me about anticipation
'just you wait till I get you home!!"
16--mother taught me about envy
"there are millions of unfortunate children in this world that don't have wonderful parents like you do"
17--mother taught me about receiving
"you are gonna get it when I get you home"
18--mother taught me medical science
"if you don't quit crossing your eyes they might get stuck that way"
19
mother taught me esp
"put on a sweater,dont you think I know when you are cold?"
20--mother taught me humor
"if that lawn mower cuts off your toes don't come runnin to me"
21--mother taught me how to become an adult
"if you don't eat your vegetables you will never grow up"
22--mother taught me genetics
"you are just like your father"
23--mother taught me about my roots
"shut that door were you born in a barn?"
24--mother taught me wisdom
"when you get to be my age then you will know what I know"
25-- mother taught me justice
"one day you will have children and I hope they are just as disobedient as you"

MOTHERS YOU GOTTA LOVE EM