Jokes for the 'Vid
Apr 22, 2021 12:34:01 #
1. If Covid makes people lose their taste, I think we need to test everyone who likes "Keeping up with the Kardashians" because clearly they have no taste.
2. Seriously does Covid make people Crap or something? What was the deal with toilet paper hoarders?
3. How will you celebrate the 1 year anniversary of two weeks to flatten the curve?
4. I'm not saying i believe in Chain letters but I did get one a week before covid started that i didn't pass on.
5. Social distancing came easy for me, Everyone stays away from me anyway.
6. Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken behind it didn’t know how to socially distance properly.
7. Two grandmothers were bragging about their precious darlings. One of them says to the other, “Mine are so good at social distancing, they won’t even call me.
8. ”Who’s idea was it to sing “Happy Birthday” while washing your hands? Now every time I go to the bathroom, my kids expect me to walk out with a cake.
9.My mom always told me I wouldn’t accomplish anything by lying in bed all day. But look at me now, ma! I’m saving the world!
10. After years of wanting to thoroughly clean my house but lacking the time, this week I discovered that wasn’t the reason.
11. If I keep stress-eating at this level, the buttons on my shirt will start socially distancing from each other.
12. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
13. Yesterday I ran out of soap and body wash and all I could find was dish detergent. Then it Dawned on me.
14. Being quarantined with a talkative child is like having an insane parrot glued to your shoulder
15. I never thought the comment “I wouldn’t touch them with a six-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!
2. Seriously does Covid make people Crap or something? What was the deal with toilet paper hoarders?
3. How will you celebrate the 1 year anniversary of two weeks to flatten the curve?
4. I'm not saying i believe in Chain letters but I did get one a week before covid started that i didn't pass on.
5. Social distancing came easy for me, Everyone stays away from me anyway.
6. Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken behind it didn’t know how to socially distance properly.
7. Two grandmothers were bragging about their precious darlings. One of them says to the other, “Mine are so good at social distancing, they won’t even call me.
8. ”Who’s idea was it to sing “Happy Birthday” while washing your hands? Now every time I go to the bathroom, my kids expect me to walk out with a cake.
9.My mom always told me I wouldn’t accomplish anything by lying in bed all day. But look at me now, ma! I’m saving the world!
10. After years of wanting to thoroughly clean my house but lacking the time, this week I discovered that wasn’t the reason.
11. If I keep stress-eating at this level, the buttons on my shirt will start socially distancing from each other.
12. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.
13. Yesterday I ran out of soap and body wash and all I could find was dish detergent. Then it Dawned on me.
14. Being quarantined with a talkative child is like having an insane parrot glued to your shoulder
15. I never thought the comment “I wouldn’t touch them with a six-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are!
Apr 22, 2021 13:13:56 #
The CDB is Awesome wrote:
1. If Covid makes people lose their taste, I think... (show quote)
History shows that this pandemic crap happens around every 100 years. Just think CDB you may have to go thru this sh@* again.
Apr 22, 2021 13:36:44 #
plumbob wrote:
History shows that this pandemic crap happens around every 100 years. Just think CDB you may have to go thru this sh@* again.
Doubtful I won't live that long. I'd be lucky to see 30
Apr 22, 2021 13:42:14 #
The CDB is Awesome wrote:
Doubtful I won't live that long. I'd be lucky to see 30
Why is that?
Apr 22, 2021 13:45:15 #
EasternOZ wrote:
Why is that?
Looking at my current path its just doubtful lol
For instance, How many of y'all have ran into a barb wire fence at top speed on a utv?
I Still got the wounds from that...
Apr 22, 2021 16:33:46 #
The CDB is Awesome wrote:
Looking at my current path its just doubtful lol
For instance, How many of y'all have ran into a barb wire fence at top speed on a utv?
I Still got the wounds from that...
For instance, How many of y'all have ran into a barb wire fence at top speed on a utv?
I Still got the wounds from that...
Wounds heal and you move on. Many on here could top that and look at the majority age group here. You are the future CDB, make us proud.
Apr 22, 2021 16:36:08 #
Apr 22, 2021 16:38:18 #
Apr 22, 2021 16:38:55 #
plumbob wrote:
Wounds heal and you move on. Many on here could top that and look at the majority age group here. You are the future CDB, make us proud.
The real wounds haven't arrived, My dad hasn't seen where I tore the fence down yet.
Apr 22, 2021 16:40:15 #
Apr 22, 2021 16:40:53 #
The CDB is Awesome wrote:
The real wounds haven't arrived, My dad hasn't seen where I tore the fence down yet.
Has he seen your wounds?
Apr 22, 2021 16:42:04 #
The CDB is Awesome wrote:
The real wounds haven't arrived, My dad hasn't seen where I tore the fence down yet.
Sounds like man up time, fix it and see what happens.
Apr 22, 2021 16:47:05 #
plumbob wrote:
Sounds like man up time, fix it and see what happens.
I did, But he will lecture me just because it happened... Even though he has ran over the Barn with the tractor three times.. how does that even happen? Did it sneak up on him?
Apr 22, 2021 16:47:29 #
EasternOZ wrote:
Has he seen your wounds?
No. I'm just gonna play this one on the down low.
Apr 22, 2021 16:54:16 #
The CDB is Awesome wrote:
I did, But he will lecture me just because it happened... Even though he has ran over the Barn with the tractor three times.. how does that even happen? Did it sneak up on him?
That's it a lecture ? All part of growing up. Wont be long and you will out in the world dealing with other crap. Just a life's lesson.
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